More Rasputina shows on the rise....

sitting here thinking of what I should be doing right now. I wrote a long blog as soon as we arrived back in NY after the Rasp tour and my computer shut down at the end, before I posted...so all my pearls of wisdom and marvelous stories were lost. I was too irritated with the loss at the time to try and write it again. ANYWAY....Being in Rasputina definitely makes me work on my chops technically as a cellist,/////stuff I haven't really paid much attention too since music school some million years ago. makes me think about the interesting battle in the studied and analytical  side of music versus the  intuitive writing....the ones you  can just listen to before they have ever been played. I think in the case of PP, I have always heard things in clips...flashes. But very often when trying to bring it out, it gets stuck. It breaks down somehow...Maybe all musicians spend their lives trying to get right, what they already hear. MY POINT! I am interested to expand the boundaries of song writing for Polly Panic. I have gotten a certain sound down very well...and I do soooo love that sound. But it is a small percent of what I hear...maybe because I know how to translate it better? I would really like to expand, but it is very hard to get out of the space you have made for yourself...Worked really hard to grind in until there is a space, and now I can't get out. HHhmmm. But as I say, being in Rasp certainly helps. For one thing, it gives hope. Trying to work without any hope is a little difficult. But here we are, hope and all.  

I am not scheduling that many Polly Panic shows right now (by which I mean none, unless with a performance art group or the right musical circumstance). I want to get my new cd done in early 2017, and hopefully get in on some other shows....with aerialist or burlesque dancers....I love those shows. But I have spent years playing shows that very few people attended and it WEARS ME OUT!! I don't know how to get it where I need it to be, but I know that doing the same thing over and over and over and expecting something different to happen is usually a waste. so i am gonna try a different way.  Ideas always accepted.